Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Spiritual osmosis.

From the Lord.

"What you get…even from other people is from Me, anyways."

"When you don't have your love to give him, give him Mine."


I have very wise friends.
Too much learning went on in my head today. And outside of me.

Spiritual Osmosis.
Skin is only the outer wall of the temple
the Holy of Holies
it stretches
it pulls
it pushes
it contains
but it doesn't keep Him in.

our bodies move together
like moving churches
collide.
cringe.
argue.
learn.
pray.
together.
for the Body is not a building...

the curtain has fallen
and the spirit moves as the spirit wishes
going from body to body
all at once
moving
interceding
changing us.
my skin is only a gate
to house the Creator.
He moves us but never leaves.

this frail frame of a body
has become a throne room
of my King.
I can dance before Him
and He with me
and no reservations.
in His throne room.
the cobwebs are gone
the corners swept clean.
the demons still lurk
but they shudder.

for they know Who made
the skin I'm in.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Knowledge is...

...just more knowledge.

This semester has brought upon many challenges already. I'm actually excited about learning now. Everything is applicable.
New is frightening, but frightening is fun and exciting.

My segmented areas of life are slowly fading so that everything spills over into each other. I think this is how life is supposed to be.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Psalm 116.7



Be at rest once more, O my soul,
for the Lord has been good to you.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Weddings.

Laura & Chris' wedding was on Saturday. It was probably the most unexpectedly enjoyable wedding I've been to. It's not that I was expecting it to be unenjoyable, I just had a lot on my mind and wasn't expecting to lighten up. I just had a terrible attitude.
However, there was a lot of dancing...of which I did a lot of [I'm a very uncomfortable dancer. It's rather a sad state of affairs] and it was so much fun! I tried to brush up on my swing and attempted to teach my brother. We also learned to hula!

All the Cruess kids love to dance. And they're incredible at it. So Laura and all the bridesmaids choreographed a dance and Sean, Kevin, Scott and Robbie did what they always do.
...[my camera ran out of battery.] Enjoy.




It was really good to see the whole family again.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Fair isn't so fair.

On so many levels.

I just drove East to West on Ventura towards school and I always find myself ashamedly looking towards the EDD building and all the people waiting outside waiting to meet with someone to find a job. Today, though, as I looked I realized I never realized the fairgrounds are literally across the fence from the EDD. This year, apparently they're [the Fair?] putting in nice new fake palm trees and a new awning thing...and more stuff I couldn't make heads or tails of. But it was nice. And shiny. And new.
And there was a mom and three dirty little kids sitting on the ground by the fence. Just waiting.

The contrast was dispiriting. I really have nothing else to say about it.
Putting thousands of dollars of shiny plastic-y things that will be up for a week that's for the purpose of doing nothing but sucking the money out of people and pumping grease into them has never seemed like a good idea to me. [Even though I let my heretical self participate every year. And eat the deep-fried things. I'm going to hell for sure.]

And yet the job search goes on...

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Get up, please.




Let's switch dichotomies, please. Or perhaps merge.
The Truth is probably above the lines we draw for ourselves.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Matthew 25.31-46

The sheep and the goats.


this song illustrates this passage perfectly. (such a great song...have a listen.)

Love or Gain
by Lakes

I learned to pray with my eyes closed.
But I never thought that meant
Turning blindly to grace.
And I'd rather see when the sun sets,
And open my eyes to a world full of pain

America
Dream your dreams.
Ignore and neglect the strangers needs.

America
To love or gain.
Dream your dreams.
Raise up your hands for the blessing.
Bow your heads and bury your gold.
Close your eyes to compassion.
Say your prayers and wait for your circle to grow.

America
Dream your dreams.
Of wealth and success in Jesus name.

America
Dream your dreams.
Ignore and neglect the strangers needs

America
To love or gain
Dream your dreams.
Have we no ounce of love in our veins?

America
Dream your dreams
Of wealth and success in Jesus name.

America
Dream your dreams.
Ignore and neglect the strangers needs.

America
To love or gain.
Dream your dreams.


Thought from Bono: In Conversation with Michka Assayas :

"Sixty-five hundred Africans are dying every day of a preventable, treatable disease. And its is not a priority for the West: two 9/11s a day, eighteen jumbo jets of fathers, mothers, families falling out of the sky. No tears, no letters of condolence, no fifty-one-gun salutes. Why? Because we don't put the same value on African life as we put on a European or an American life. God will not let us get away with this, history certainly won't let us get away with our excuses. We say we can't get these antiretroviral drugs to the farthest reaches of Africa, but we can get them our cold fizzy drinks. The tiniest village, you can find a bottle of Coke. Look, if we really thought that an African life was equal in value to an English, a French, or an Irish life, we wouldn't let two and a half million Africans die every year for the stupidest of reasons: money. We just wouldn't. And a very prominent head of state said to me: 'It's true. If these people weren't Africans, we just couldn't let it happen.' We don't really deep down believe in their equality." -Bono.

I concur. There's one thing I've learned between the difference between charity and justice. Charity is nice for everyone. Both sides benefit: I feel good because I gave money [a few bucks or 10%] or a sweater or a few cans of beans I don't particularly like from my own pantry, and the guy receiving must have to feel better now that he has something I've given him. Great.
No. The problem still remains.
He still wants and I still have.
He's still hungry for more...anything... and I want to feel good about myself for giving.
Justice, on the other hand, is moral rightness or equity and taking action based on that knowledge. It means to change the problem at hand, you need to change how people view poverty. Anyone can give to charity, but you have to work for justice. To do this, you must know people...and be willing to get dirty. Get down in the ground and get to know those who you're advocating, fighting and pulling for.
[Side note: Aren't we supposed to do this in our walks with Christ? In order to truly understand and experience the beauty of Christ's love and redemption, we have to get to know Him in the deepest recesses of life and relationships. Huh. Go figure.]
Secondly, it's good to "know" people. People whose job it to can advocate and make changes and make laws. For Bono, this is easy. For me, not so much. But you get the picture.

I personally have always seen all of this as too big a problem. But the only reason I see it this way is because of Bono's point... I see it as a money problem. The problem is so much deeper than money. When will we wake up and see how much we have and actually do something, anything to do our part. If not, wouldn't we be lukewarm? I know I am. I get so paralyzed just thinking about this stuff. But I'm asking God every day to show me what I can do. I'm not talking just about Africa. About poverty in my own city. I get so irked by how unfair the social class system is just around my school. I hate driving to school.
But poverty here is posh compared to Africa. Heavens, here you could find a whole hamburger in the trash somewhere.
[I really have no right to talk about Africa. I know next to nothing. But I do know some. And I want more than anything to go there someday.]

I've also started asking Him to show me radical love. Not what everyone else thinks love is... but Love. Oh, Abba, teach me.

My prayers aren't so much in the church anymore as they are outside the church.
Though both are of utmost importance.

Shoot. I need to stop talking.

Monday, September 15, 2008

And this I know with all my heart.

She wants to press her face into His robes and breathe life. To finally reach out and grasp Him. To know completely what love feels like. I want to see His face look into mine and say, "You're all mine." Behold, He wipes away her tears and holds her close.


How deep the Father's love for us,
How v a s t beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make this wretch His treasure

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom.


This love is too much to take. All the knowledge in the world, all the frustration and confusion, all the , every hang-up, all the earthly groaning, all conventional practices, all the words we could ever conjure... all of it fades. Compared to the infinite, overflowing compassionate love of Christ no comparison can be made. It shakes foundations and makes order become disorder.

His little daughter is more than a conqueror through Him who loved her first. Nothing could ever be invented in all creation that could ever separate His love from her. Nothing she could ever say or do could change the intimate way He sees her.
Only in this Truth is she made new.

This is really all she wants.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Laybor Daybor.


...even if your summer was fantastic.


Archival evidence.